{"id":1764,"date":"1995-07-01T15:25:07","date_gmt":"1995-07-01T15:25:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/1995\/07\/01\/invata-cum-sa-castigi-simpatia-oamenilor\/"},"modified":"2026-05-15T14:47:43","modified_gmt":"2026-05-15T14:47:43","slug":"invata-sa-dominezi-interlocutori","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/ro\/1995\/07\/01\/invata-sa-dominezi-interlocutori\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00cenva\u021b\u0103 s\u0103 dominezi interlocutorii"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<style type=\"text\/css\" data-created_by=\"avia_inline_auto\" id=\"style-css-av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac\">\n#top .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac{\npadding-bottom:10px;\nfont-size:3vw;\n}\nbody .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag .heading-char{\nfont-size:25px;\n}\n#top #wrap_all .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag{\nfont-size:3vw;\n}\n.av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-subheading{\nfont-size:15px;\n}\n\n@media only screen and (min-width: 990px){ \n#top #wrap_all .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag{\nfont-size:46px;\n}\n}\n\n@media only screen and (min-width: 768px) and (max-width: 989px){ \n#top #wrap_all .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag{\nfont-size:46px;\n}\n}\n\n@media only screen and (min-width: 480px) and (max-width: 767px){ \n#top #wrap_all .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag{\nfont-size:46px;\n}\n}\n\n@media only screen and (max-width: 479px){ \n#top #wrap_all .av-special-heading.av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac .av-special-heading-tag{\nfont-size:46px;\n}\n}\n<\/style>\n<div  class='av-special-heading av-mofx3fg2-eba68cc5fac2ff36886be2c8f99429ac av-special-heading-h2 blockquote modern-quote  avia-builder-el-0  el_before_av_textblock  avia-builder-el-first  av-inherit-size'><h2 class='av-special-heading-tag '  itemprop=\"headline\"  >\u00cenva\u021b\u0103 s\u0103 dominezi interlocutorii<\/h2><div class=\"special-heading-border\"><div class=\"special-heading-inner-border\"><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n<style type=\"text\/css\" data-created_by=\"avia_inline_auto\" id=\"style-css-av-mofx870y-30ce7278123d3e096898102e7d0ca32d\">\n#top .av_textblock_section.av-mofx870y-30ce7278123d3e096898102e7d0ca32d .avia_textblock{\nfont-size:17px;\n}\n<\/style>\n<section  class='av_textblock_section av-mofx870y-30ce7278123d3e096898102e7d0ca32d '   itemscope=\"itemscope\" itemtype=\"https:\/\/schema.org\/BlogPosting\" itemprop=\"blogPost\" ><div class='avia_textblock'  itemprop=\"text\" ><p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-301 alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/1995\/07\/people.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"440\" height=\"311\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/1995\/07\/people.jpg 640w, https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/1995\/07\/people-300x212.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/1995\/07\/people-260x185.jpg 260w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 440px) 100vw, 440px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>It is truly a great pleasure to begin this collaboration with this magazine.<br \/>\nCommunication and sales techniques\u2014a field in which I believe I have solid theoretical and practical training\u2014form the foundation of every commercial activity and, indeed, of every human activity.<br \/>\nNeuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a new science, derived from cognitive psychology and cybernetics, that enables complete control over the basic components that constitute human experience.<br \/>\nIts application in the fields of psychotherapy and business has yielded remarkable results, and its potential is still far from being fully realized.<br \/>\nLike any complex technique, it cannot be learned solely from books, much less from magazines; but I am confident that some of the concepts underlying NLP will be immediately useful, and in the future we will see how they can be further explored.<br \/>\nBut, to begin with, instead of talking about the technique, I\u2019d like to share a few reflections and perhaps a bit of philosophy.<br \/>\nEveryone knows that every daily activity is very complex in its own way and that you need to learn rules and methods to do something specific\u2014not just to do it any old way, but to do it well.<br \/>\nDespite this, one of the things that has always amazed me, when reflecting on the nature of the world, is that although reality appears complex, there are still some basic concepts that, once understood, can be used to grasp the whole of reality.<br \/>\nFor example, the concept of survival: every living organism (animal, human) or social entity (company, state) has survival and self-perpetuation as its primary objective. Ignoring this principle in daily life inevitably leads to misguided behavior, with disastrous consequences.<\/p>\n<h2>The Fundamental Principle of Exchange<\/h2>\n<p>Another fundamental concept is that of exchange: no organism is self-sufficient and, consequently, constantly needs something from its environment\u2014whether natural or social\u2014such as food, information, protection, or love.<br \/>\nTo obtain these things, it must give something of its own in exchange, to create a balanced exchange (money, labor, various information, etc.). Obviously, money is merely a practical tool for quickly and fairly facilitating some of these possible transactions.<br \/>\nWhen I say that money isn\u2019t everything, it simply means that there are things we need for our survival that don\u2019t have a price that can be expressed in currency. (How much is a sincere smile worth?, for example).<br \/>\nAs a corollary to the above, it can be said that we can obtain what we need only in proportion to what we are able and willing to give in exchange (a smile has no price, but I can get one with a polite gesture or a good joke).<\/p>\n<h2>The 3 Crucial Questions for Every Interaction<\/h2>\n<p>From what I\u2019ve said so far, there\u2019s a maxim I\u2019d like to see written everywhere in big letters\u2014one that each of us should reflect on every day:<br \/>\n<strong>\u201cIf I give someone what they want and need, they will give me what I want and need.\u201d<\/strong><br \/>\nIf what I\u2019ve said is true (and I guarantee it is), three questions immediately arise:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>How can you know what another person truly wants?<\/li>\n<li>How can I know what I truly want? (This question may seem strange, but it is the most important one, and we will discuss it another time.)<\/li>\n<li>How can I make it clear to the other person what I want, and how can I convince them that the exchange is beneficial for both of us?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>This brings us to the very heart of the matter, to the key concept of existence, which is communication.<br \/>\nEverything I do\u2014and I emphasize \u201ceverything\u201d\u2014involves \u201ccommunication\u201d or, as the Palo Alto School of Psychology puts it: \u201cevery behavior is communication.\u201d<br \/>\nCommunication with people, of course, but also with machines, with social entities, etc.<br \/>\nFor example, when I drive a car, I communicate my intention to turn the steering wheel or to adjust the accelerator; similarly, the car is designed so that it can communicate to me when the fuel is low or the engine is malfunctioning.<br \/>\nI intentionally used an extreme example to highlight some principles of communication:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>To be understood, I must use language that is familiar and, therefore, accessible to the listener. (It is pointless to tell the car, \u201cTurn right now!\u201d; instead, I must signal and turn the steering wheel.)<\/li>\n<li>What matters is not what you intend to communicate, but what the listener understands (this relationship is defined by the concept of feedback).<\/li>\n<li>The communicator is primarily responsible for the outcome of the communication. (If someone misunderstands me, it is not their fault, but mine. I must change my manner of communication.)<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>All these considerations may seem rather trivial, but practical experience shows that:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>We always forget about them.<\/li>\n<li>We never have an \u201cinstruction manual\u201d for accessing another person\u2019s mind, and thus for being understood by them.<\/li>\n<li>People are much more complicated than machines, so interpersonal communication is the most complex type of communication.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Nevertheless, it is curious that everyone understands the need for serious study to learn, for example, how to use a computer\u2014which is, after all, a very simple thing\u2014yet they do not see the need to learn the principles of how the human mind works, which is infinitely more complex than a computer.<\/p>\n<h2>The 3 Levels of Communication: Breaking the Myth<\/h2>\n<p>One thing that further complicates human communication is that it takes place on three levels:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>Logical<\/li>\n<li>Paraverbal<\/li>\n<li>Nonverbal<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Of these, the logical level (i.e., the level of words) accounts for only 7% of the total communication process; 38% occurs at the paraverbal level (tone, volume, speaking speed, etc.), and 55% at the nonverbal level (facial expressions, posture, movement, clothing, etc.).<br \/>\nIf there are no contradictions between these levels, communication can be effective.<br \/>\nHowever, if there are contradictions between the levels, the message conveyed will not have the intended effect.<br \/>\nFor example, a poorly educated person who struck it rich, no matter how well-dressed and elegant they may be (nonverbal communication), would immediately be exposed at the level of logical communication, and in their case, the clothes would no longer make the man.<\/p>\n<p>Or, to illustrate the relationship between the logical and paraverbal levels, it is often said that what matters is not \u201cwhat you say,\u201d but \u201chow you say it.\u201d<br \/>\nKind words spoken in a harsh tone are not received as such.<br \/>\nFrom this, a conclusion we will return to is worth emphasizing: in the act of human communication, we must focus equally on all levels of communication: logical (verbal), paraverbal, and nonverbal.<br \/>\nI said earlier that there is no manual on how to reach a person\u2019s consciousness, but I was exaggerating.<br \/>\nNeuro-Linguistic Programming allows us to create this manual.<br \/>\nFirst, by decoding and describing the processes of the human brain with near-mathematical precision, and then by identifying those \u201clevers\u201d that can be used to influence the conscious and unconscious decisions of our interlocutors.<br \/>\nWe\u2019ll discuss all of this in our upcoming meetings.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/section>\n<section  class='av_textblock_section av-av_textblock-04ce062f0f531db95fa373377a6da7d4 '   itemscope=\"itemscope\" itemtype=\"https:\/\/schema.org\/BlogPosting\" itemprop=\"blogPost\" ><div class='avia_textblock'  itemprop=\"text\" ><\/div><\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Descoper\u0103 principiile fundamentale ale comunic\u0103rii eficiente \u0219i ale PNL. Afl\u0103 de ce schimbul de valoare \u0219i st\u0103p\u00e2nirea nivelurilor logic, paraverbal \u0219i nonverbal sunt adev\u0103ratele chei pentru a c\u00e2\u0219tiga simpatia oamenilor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":511,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35,8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1764","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-article","category-uncategorized-ro"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.6 (Yoast SEO v27.7) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Cum s\u0103 convingi oamenii: comunicare eficient\u0103 \u0219i PNL | Bruno Medicina<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Vrei s\u0103 afli cum s\u0103 convingi oamenii? Descoper\u0103 principiile fundamentale ale comunic\u0103rii eficiente \u0219i ale PNL pentru a st\u0103p\u00e2ni cele trei niveluri ale interac\u021biunii umane.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.brunomedicina.com\/ro\/1995\/07\/01\/invata-sa-dominezi-interlocutori\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ro_RO\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Cum s\u0103 convingi oamenii: comunicare eficient\u0103 \u0219i PNL |\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Vrei s\u0103 afli cum s\u0103 convingi oamenii? 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