Do we love things because they are beautiful, or do things become beautiful because we love them?

The Eye of the Beholder: Does Objective Beauty Exist?

Is there any mother who doesn’t consider her own child to be the most beautiful in the world? I don’t think so: regardless of what others might think and any physical flaws the child might have, the mother’s perception will still be one of absolute and unconditional beauty.

Throughout history, humans have tried to understand what “beauty” truly is, what “love” truly means, and it is clear that the debate is far from over; and if we consider that everyone knows what these concepts are about, it is only natural that each person finds their own answer.

On the other hand, it seems to me that not enough attention has been paid to the direct connection that exists between beauty and love: regardless of objective aesthetic criteria, if we love someone, they seem “beautiful” to us; and at the same time, if someone seems “beautiful” to us, a feeling of “love” is automatically triggered.

Love and Beauty as Synonyms?

This is true—naturally, at different levels and in different expressions—for relatives, partners, friends, mere acquaintances… but also for animals, plants, objects… That is why a tiny little puppy seems extremely beautiful to us and is capable of melting even the hardest heart.

Art, in all its forms, is the most eloquent example of the connection between love and beauty: we like (we love…) a painting, a symphony, a film precisely because it is beautiful; obviously, the opposite is also true: we find any person or object we do not appreciate unpleasant or ugly.

It seems that “to love” and “to perceive beauty” can be considered almost synonymous.

On the other hand, nothing in and of itself is beautiful: a painting that strikes us as the pinnacle of beauty may mean nothing to someone else; a melody that seems wonderful to us may be boring to others.
So beauty—just like love—does not exist in and of itself, but defines a connection between the observer and the observed; a connection in which the “beautiful” object is merely the catalyst for an experience of “beauty” in the mind of the beholder. Consequently, the observer is not neutral, but actively participates in creating the experience of beauty (and in fact, popular wisdom says that beauty is in the eye of the beholder).

Our capacity to love—and thus to perceive beauty—defines our level of spiritual evolution; thus, everyone loves their child or parents, while only a spiritual master will love anyone unconditionally (even an enemy, as the Gospel teaches us) and will find beauty everywhere, even in seemingly ugly things. In the same way, a master will find a positive side to even the most terrible events.

Once again, it is demonstrated that our mind and soul create the experience of beauty and love.

But… since love and the perception of beauty are our own internal experiences, are we truly capable of perceiving external beauty? Are we truly capable of loving if we do not first experience this feeling toward ourselves?

Is it possible to offer others what we do not have?

How can this experience manifest itself within us?

Do we look in the mirror and dislike what we see? Do we observe our behavior and detest ourselves?
Do we constantly underestimate and criticize ourselves?

The True Challenge: Loving Yourself First

There are many misconceptions in this regard; in many ways, we confuse self-love with arrogance or selfishness; we criticize and hurt ourselves using the same tone and arguments our parents and teachers used back in the day, and in any case, the distortion of Christian thought leads us to say that “we are not worthy of love.”

But Jesus said something else, and it seems that few have grasped the great truth contained in the phrase “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 19:19), which implies that in order to love others, you must first and foremost love yourself.

And… loving yourself simply means perceiving your own beauty, which has not the slightest connection to the opinions of others or to the models proposed by the media, but to our unconditional acceptance of ourselves as we are, despite our obvious imperfections.

Acceptance, the perception of beauty, and love for every being, object, and event is a formula that defines the way a saint faces the world and the universe, and it may represent reconnection with God (or alignment with energy, if you prefer), which is the true goal of all our actions.

It is not a simple thing; there are no shortcuts; it cannot be bought, and it can only happen through true spiritual growth.

Separating Behavior from the “Higher Self”

But of course we can do something: so, if we view beauty and love as an experience, we can try first and foremost to appreciate ourselves (note that “appreciation” doesn’t mean doing something foolish and then patting ourselves on the back, but rather that—beyond any mistake due to our imperfection, there is always a spark of spiritual light that guides us if we know how to perceive it).

So, it means separating behavior—which, of course, can be wrong and can be improved—from our true being, from our higher self that always exists, like the sun behind the clouds, and which is perfect by definition.

When we manage to do this, we will be able to recognize beauty everywhere; we will be able to find a positive meaning in any event. It won’t be easy, obviously. No one has ever claimed that spiritual evolution would be easy.

So, when you see someone you can’t stand, stop for a moment and try to see how beautiful they are. Think that they, too, have a perfect higher self, which does not manifest due to fear, doubt, fatigue, poor upbringing, or misguided beliefs… think what an extraordinary being they would be if they could manifest their positive side. Look for whatever seems positive to you, and you will see how your perception changes.

The Ultimate Magic: Becoming a Creator

Likewise, when an event occurs that seems disastrous to us, I suggest we pause for a moment and look for all the positive aspects, which I assure you are always there. Let’s remember that it’s not the negative events that create our unhappiness, but our reaction to those events. Everything depends on us.

When we manage to adopt this attitude, we can consider ourselves creators.
We have created an experience of beauty and love.
Our energy level has risen.
Our spiritual development has taken another step forward.

And this, too, is magic….

by Bruno